


Tonight, we belong to each other.

by Brieoftarth



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: angsttttt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:26:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26196355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brieoftarth/pseuds/Brieoftarth
Summary: “Don’t. Don’t contact her. She’s happy and she’s loved. You and your god forsaken family have to stay away from her. If you love her, let her go.”Selwyn’s words ring through Jaime’s mind as his eyes search the crowd to find her again. She shouldn’t be hard to miss, the tallest woman in any room. In Jaime’s eyes, the most magnificent woman in any room.
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Comments: 27
Kudos: 78





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Lewispanda for beta'ing this for me and always being so lovely and encouraging :_; Also Blue, I am sorry that this has taken me five million years to write

The first time Jaime sees her, she’s across the room and fixing her husband's bow tie. She straightens it for him and he can see the corners of her lips twitch upwards as her husband says something, and Jaime knows he should be happy that she’s loved and happy, but he can’t find it in him. He watches her kiss the corner of her husband's lips before they walk into the room, and as she turns around her eye catches his and her smile falls. His chest tightens. 

He imagined the first time that he saw Brienne again would be some romantic affair. Slow motion, running into each arms, passionate kissing until neither of them can breathe again. And he can’t breathe, not really, but not for the reason he imagined. They stare at each other for what seems like a lifetime but realistically isn’t any longer than ten seconds, until he feels his wife's hand on his back, directing him to a guest that he hasn’t yet spoken to. 

Jaime turns away so he can politely greet his father's guest, and when he looks back to where she was just seconds ago but she’s no longer there. He sighs to himself, but he knows she probably wouldn’t want to see him. 

Brienne had been smitten with Jaime, and Jaime had been smitten with Brienne. They had a happy four year relationship, full of love and laughter and arguing and debating. They had moved in with each other after a year of dating, and often lay in bed just staring at the ceiling as they played with each other's hands and listed off the things they were going to do. Go travelling, buy a house, adopt a dog (Brienne made it very clear that they were adopting), marry and then have children. Everything else they would take it as it came. 

Then everything that they had, everything that they had shared together had been taken away from them. The last time Jaime had seen Brienne was the day he left for a work conference in Lannisport. She had dropped him off at the airport, kissed him goodbye and she had even shed a tear even though they were only going to be separated for a week. She had stayed in the airport until he was out of sight. He came home a day earlier than planned, ready to surprise his girlfriend late into the evening, but as he opened the door to their apartment, it was empty. It wasn’t just Brienne that wasn’t there, but all of her things. Every last thing that she had owned was gone apart from a box that lay on their bed, holding every memory and gift they had shared in their time together. She had left no forwarding address, and every time he tried to call her, it would immediately disconnect. So, he gave up. It was over.

It hadn’t taken Tywin long to swoop in and suggest a new partner for Jaime. It was common knowledge that he had never liked Brienne. Her name brought nothing to their table, she was  _ hideous _ and she was too smart for her own good. Melara, on the other hand, came from a good family. A rich family, with connections that would not only benefit Jaime and his career, but the whole Lannister family and company. She was the opposite of Brienne; short, brunette, petite. It pained him to admit it but although Melara was kind, patient and funny when she wanted to be, he hated her at first because she wasn’t  _ Brienne.  _ Despite Brienne leaving him, he couldn’t hate  _ her _ . 

Six months into his marriage with Melara and one year after Brienne had left him, Jaime had met Selwyn in a coffee shop and it had taken him by surprise. He sat down with the older man, asked him questions. “Why did she leave?” “Why didn’t she talk to me?” “Where is she now?” “What is she doing now?” Selwyn bitterly explained everything, and left out nothing to spare Jaime’s feelings. He explained that Tywin and Cersei had accosted Brienne the night she had come home from dropping Jaime off at the airport. They had picked her apart, insulting everything from her appearance to her personality to her intelligence. Once they were done with her, there wasn’t an ounce of self esteem left in Brienne. People often perceived her as strong, resilient, and by the Seven, she  _ was _ , but not as much as everyone had estimated. Jaime’s heart broke all over again as he listened to Selwyn and he wanted to go after his father, but he wanted to find Brienne first. He asked Selwyn where he could find her; and then his heart hurt more than he knew was possible. 

She was married.  _ Happily _ married, as Selwyn had put it. 

“Don’t. Don’t contact her. She’s happy and she’s loved. You and your god forsaken family have to stay away from her. If you love her, let her go.” 

Selwyn’s words ring through Jaime’s mind as his eyes search the crowd to find her again. She shouldn’t be hard to miss, the tallest woman in any room. In Jaime’s eyes, the most magnificent woman in any room. 

He thinks that he spots her sapphire blue dress at a table near the back but his wife tugs on his hand to lead him to their table. It has been two and a half years since he saw her, and he sighs to himself because all he wants to do is look at her again. 

Jaime knows he’s not the best husband. He thinks he loves Melara, but he knows it’s nothing like the love he had with Brienne. Melara deserves better than a husband like him, he thinks, but he does appreciate her. He dotes on her constantly, because that’s what she deserves, but she also deserves someone that isn’t in love with someone else. 

He’s standing at the bar when a plain looking man with forgettable features turns around in the queue, and looks straight at him. He gives an awkward smile, but then he realises that the man he’s staring at is Brienne’s husband. 

“You’re Jaime,” the other man says.

“I’m Jaime.” 

“Hyle. Hyle Hunt. I kinda hoped you weren’t as handsome as she told me.” 

Jaime just laughs, because that’s all he can do in such an uncomfortable situation. And Hyle smiles at him -- Jaime is thankful that there doesn’t seem to be any animosity between them. He seems nice, and Jaime can’t stop himself. 

“May I dance with her? Just one dance, I just want--” He can’t get another word out, because Hyle is already pointing in the direction of his table, where Jaime spots Brienne drawing patterns on her napkin with her finger. She looks different, her hair is shorter than he remembers. 

Now that he has Hyle’s permission, Jaime grabs the drinks that he had ordered and crosses the room to his wife. He doesn’t sit down, he just places his prosthetic hand on the back of her chair and leans down to talk to her. 

“Can I ask her to dance?” 

Melara smiles, all she ever does is smile politely, and leans up to kiss his cheek as she whispers “of course” into his ear. He doesn’t even have to clarify who he’s talking about. 

He walks towards Brienne’s table and he can see her look away from his direction, avoiding his eyes. He stops beside her table and holds out his good hand for her to take. She stares at it, then back to her husband who nods with half a smile, and she takes it as she stands up. Jaime leads them onto the dance floor and there are at least ten other couples that are dancing to whatever slow song the band is playing, but to Jaime it feels like they’re the only people in the room. He hopes that’s what it feels like for her too. He wraps his right arm around her waist and his left holds onto her hand. She places her free hand on top of his shoulder. At first she keeps her distance from him, but it doesn’t take long for her to shuffle closer to him until they’re pressed together. He doesn’t say anything and she doesn’t either, because they don’t have to. He holds her tightly as they sway together, and eventually her forehead drops to his shoulder. He kisses the side of her head, and feels her shoulders start to shake with gentle sobs as she hides her face against his neck. She lets go of his hand so she can wrap that arm around his neck and he circles his arm around her waist to hold her. 

“I’m right here,” he whispers, but that just makes her cry harder. 

When the song ends, he hopes he’ll get the chance to speak to her but she pulls herself out of his arms and leaves him standing on the dance floor. He watches her push the tears from her face as she leaves the ballroom and Jaime knows he shouldn’t go after her, he knows he should give her space, but he goes after her. 

He finds her in a quiet corner of the fancy hotel that Tywin had booked for his gala, and she’s sitting down folded over as she takes deep breaths. It was inevitable that she was going to see him at a Lannister do, but it didn’t make it hurt any less. She hadn’t attended the previous two because she had known how much it would hurt. 

Jaime sits down beside her and pulls her up to lean into his chest, and she doesn’t fight it. She leans into him and cries. 

“My father is a cold hearted monster,” he tells her. “He should never have spoken to you. He didn’t know what he was talking about. Neither did Cersei. All I’ve ever felt for you, Brienne, is pure love. Pure adoration. It’s all I’ll ever feel for you.” 

Brienne nods, but she still stays silent. He hasn’t heard her voice yet, and he would give anything to hear her speak one more time, but if she wasn’t ready then he wouldn’t push. She straightens up and Jaime takes his pocket square and unfolds it. He delicately wipes the tears from her cheeks, and she finally smiles at him. It’s not the big, happy smile that he was used to way back then, but it’s something. He wants to remember it forever. 

“I’ve missed you.” She finally speaks, and Jaime closes his eyes at her words. He lets out a breathy laugh, and nods as he takes his turn to rest his forehead on her shoulder. Her fingers comb through his hair as they hold each other, and Jaime never wants this moment to end. She rests her head against his and closes her eyes as they sit in silence, and her breathing evens out. 

\---------- 

As Brienne and Jaime hold each other in the reception, Hyle and Melara look on. They knew before going into their marriages that Jaime and Brienne were still in love with each other, and their marriages were based on connections and social politics rather than love, so it doesn’t hurt them as much as it should. 

Hyle watches Jaime delicately wipe the tears from Brienne’s cheek, and he turns to Melara. “We should-- We should let them have this night. Each year, just --” He sighs, not knowing what the smaller woman is going to say. “Just let them share one night together.” 

Melara nods in agreement, and Hyle takes her back into the ballroom for a drink. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to Anja for beta'ing some of this! <3

It has been one full year since Brienne last saw Jaime and cried in his arms, yet she still thinks about him every day. He’s the first person she thinks about when she wakes up, and the last person she thinks about when she goes to sleep at night, and she feels  _ awful _ . Her husband is wonderful and kind, he holds her every night before they fall asleep in each other’s arms, but Brienne can’t get Jaime out of her head. 

She partly blames Hyle for that, though. 

After the Lannister gala the year before, they arrived late to the penthouse that they shared, and Brienne had made a beeline for the bathroom. Hyle sat on the bed and listened to his wife sniffle from their ensuite, and he decided that talking to her about his discussion with Melara that night was not the best idea. 

Hyle sat down with her the next morning as she flicked through the Sunday newspaper. 

“You love him,” he said. 

“I love you,” Brienne replied, her head tilted as she clutched her cup of coffee. 

“I’m not saying that you don’t. I’m saying that you love him, too. And I think it’s a different type of love you have with him.” 

Hyle told her about his conversation with Melara. They had both agreed to let Jaime and Brienne spend the evening of the Lannister gala together to do whatever they wished, no grudges held and no questions asked. Brienne was offended at first -- how could her husband think she would do that to him? But Hyle reasoned with her. He was good at that. He took her face in his hands, kissed her forehead and the space between her eyes, used his softest voice. That night when they went to bed, Brienne whispered how much she loved him between kisses as they made love. 

She chooses not to wear a dress this year and instead has picked out a royal blue jumpsuit that has a cape that goes all the way down to her ankles. Brienne feels silly walking around with a cape on, but Hyle’s jaw  _ drops _ the moment she steps out of their hotel bathroom. Her makeup is light, just tinted moisturiser, the tiniest bit of mascara and a soft, pale pink lipstick. She has to apply another layer because her husband cups her cheeks and draws her closer for a long kiss, and she knows he isn’t doing it to make her feel guilty, he kisses her because he  _ likes  _ kissing her, but Brienne can’t shake the guilt. 

She has another hotel room booked, and she discreetly asked for one furthest away from her husband’s room. This was his suggestion, but it doesn’t mean that she wants to rub it in his face. And honestly, she doesn’t even know if Jaime would want to spend the night with her. 

They step inside the ballroom of the same hotel from last year, and immediately Brienne scans the crowd to look for Jaime. She can’t spot him, so she places her hand on her husband's back and leads him to their table. They find their name card and her heart skips a beat when she realises that Jaime’s name has been placed next to her -- he just hasn’t arrived yet or perhaps he’s getting a drink. 

“Drink?” 

“Whisky,” she gives her husband a smile, and he leaves her at the empty table to join the long queue of people waiting for drinks at the opposite side of the room. 

“Brienne.” 

She closes her eyes when she hears his voice and inhales, before she stands up and turns to see her ex partner with his wife. She stares at him, mouth slightly agape, for just a few seconds. He’s growing out his stubble and she instantly knows he’s agreed to spend the night with her because  _ he knows  _ how much she loved that. 

  
“Jaime, Melara, hi-- Hyle has  _ just _ left to go to the bar, I’m sorry. Had I known that you were here already I would’ve told him to get a drink for you--” 

“It’s fine, it’s fine. Sit down, don’t worry about it.” 

She nods her head, and she glances at his wife with a gentle smile. She doesn’t want to be “the other woman”, and she doesn’t want his wife to hate her. She just wants one night with her soulmate. 

“Melara, that dress is so beautiful. You look amazing,” she tells her, and Melara looks down at the red laced fabric. 

“Thank you. I like this -- Is it a jumpsuit? Suit and pants?” Melara asks, and Jaime leaves the women to make small talk about their outfits. 

Brienne sits back down once they have finished complimenting each other and shifts slightly as she fixes the cape. There’s an awkward silence at the table because she knows that Melara and Jaime have had the same conversation as her and Hyle, and she doesn’t know if addressing it would be a good idea, so she keeps her mouth closed and clasps her hands on top of her lap. 

She can’t help but glance at Melara from the corner of her eye. She’s gorgeous -- exactly the type of person that Jaime should be with, she thinks. Brienne immediately scolds herself for that thought. She has gained more confidence over the years but she does still have self-esteem issues, and she’s working on it, slowly but surely. 

“Honey,” Hyle places his drink down in front of her and pecks her forehead, and Brienne smiles at the simple gesture. 

“Thank you. What did you get?” She asks and gestures to his drink. 

“The same. Tobermory.” 

\------- 

She doesn’t dance with Jaime that night, but every so often she can feel his knee touch hers beneath the table. She only has three or four whiskys while the four of them make polite conversation. It’s just turned 11pm when Brienne feels his hand on the small of her back and he leans over to whisper in her ear. 

“Let’s go.” 

He doesn’t have to say anything else, and Hyle squeezes her knee in reassurance so she covers his hand with hers and squeezes it back. 

Jaime leaves first because they don’t want other people to know what they’re doing. She watches him collect a bottle of wine from the bar as soon as he’s out of the double doors and in the reception, Brienne excuses herself from the table and she makes the lift just before the doors close, and when she sees him standing there there’s nothing else she can do but cup both of his cheeks in her hand and kiss him. He lets out a sigh against her lips and Brienne pulls back in time to grasp the bottle of wine in her hand before he drops it. It takes them a few moments to realise that neither of them have even touched the button to take them to the correct floor, and she smiles shyly as she steps back and taps the button to take them to the 8th level. 

Her hand slips down his arm and grasps his prosthetic as they stand together while they elevator takes them up. She leads him down to their room and as she opens the door. Once the wine is sat down on the desk, she turns and he’s already trying to wrap his arms around her but she shakes her head, which makes him frown. She kisses the space between his eyes to smooth down the creases, and she pushes his suit jacket off of his shoulders and to the floor. She removes the cufflink from his shirt and starts to unstrap the prosthetic and removes it, along with the sleeves that prevent chafing and she leans her head down to kiss his stump and fuck, he looks like he’s about to weep. She wonders if Melara ever does that for him. 

“I missed you,” she tells him, and she lets him wrap his arms around her this time while she kicks off her heels, and he just buries his face against her neck, breathing her in. “I miss you every day. I think about you all the time.” 

“I dreamed of you,” he replies, and she thinks that might be the most romantic thing that anyone has ever said to her. “Every night. I dream of you.” 

She strokes through his hair with her long fingers and he starts to  _ purr _ against her skin. She’s missed everything about Jaime, but the little noises of appreciation that he tends to make is definitely in her top five. 

Brienne pulls away again, but to grab a bag that she had dropped off before meeting Hyle in his hotel room. She kneels on the bed as she pulls out two pairs of pyjamas, and she smiles as she watches Jaime pick them up. 

“They match.” He smiles, holding the fabric between his fingers and she nods.

“We always match.” 

Jaime chuckles quietly, and he places the pyjama’s down so he can start to unzip her jumpsuit at the back. She shivers as she feels his knuckles trail down her spine and she hums softly and reaches up to undo the buttons of the cape on her shoulders. Once it’s off, Brienne helps him tug her sleeves down, and she stands up to push it all the way down. Because of the deep V of the jumpsuit, Brienne had opted not to wear a bralette, and she could hear Jaime’s breath hitch as he takes in the sight of her body. She steps out of the clothing, tugs her pyjama shirt over her head, and reaches for the pants. Jaime has barely taken his eyes off her. 

Once she’s fully dressed, Brienne steps closer to Jaime and untucks his shirt before she starts undressing him. She and him both know full well that he can do it himself, but Brienne  _ wants  _ to do it. With every button she undoes, she presses a kiss to his neck and he sighs happily when she slips his shirt off of his shoulders and runs her hand down his chest. He’s so responsive to her touch and it makes Brienne weak at the knees.

But fucking is not on Brienne’s mind tonight. It  _ would _ be nice to feel him inside her once again, but their relationship was based on so much more than making love. She feels like he might feel the same way, because it’s him that grasps her hand that’s now resting on his stomach and takes it to his lips. He kisses her palm, and then each knuckle before he steps back to undo his belt and take his shoes and pants off. She holds out the pyjama pants for him and after he takes them from him, she climbs onto the large bed and turns the TV on. 

When he’s finally in bed with her, she feels him wrap his arm around her shoulders and pull her closer and Brienne  _ promised _ herself that this year she wouldn’t cry, she wouldn’t dwell on the sadness. Instead, she snuggles closer to him and they just talk. They don’t mention their marriages, they don’t talk about their personal lives because it’s already a constant reminder that they’re not together. 

They do nothing but talk and kiss and eventually, they fall asleep wrapped in each other's arms. 

When Jaime wakes the next morning, all trace of Brienne is gone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone would like to be a permanent beta for this fic, please let me know. I would really appreciate it! Send me a message on tumblr if you would like to :) My UN is evenstaroftarth

**Author's Note:**

> favourite line from Lewispanda while she was reading it is "fuck this fic"


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